Picture Taken By Me - I LOVE staring up at the sky
Today I'm Grateful For:
*For the beautiful view in my neighborhood
*For the girl time with PC
*For the many blessings upon me
*Peace of mind
*Music
On Saturday: PC was hurting, because of a misunderstanding between her and A (her guy friend). I wanted to grab her and hide her from the world, but I knew that was not the answer. We talked about everything and with all my might I tried to get her to laugh. I succeeded, but not as much as I wanted to. I told her to be honest and ask him the question she needed an answer to. She did and found out she misunderstood him the first time. I saw her smile again and my heart returned to my body. I don't honestly know If I can handle this dating thing. Even though it was a misunderstanding a huge part of me wanted to bash his face in. I can not react or feel this way each time she hurts. I want to wrap my baby in a protective shield and keep her away from boys - Forever! But, I know that would not help neither of us in any way. I'm seriously praying on it and asking God for guidance, because when it comes to my princess Mama is kind of crazy. :)
On Sunday: I awoke to PC laughing and singing to music. That was awesome! After we all had gotten dressed we headed out to Wal-Mart to grocery shop. For the first year and a half after hurricane Katrina I developed a very bad "tick." When we went grocery shopping I would over buy every item on my list. We are just a family of three, so for the month we only need $50 worth of meat not including fish. I would buy $120 or more woth of meat. We'd have canned goods and toilet paper lining every shelf I could fine. They said I was suffering from "Post Traumatic Syndrome." After the first year I noticed we were getting rid of tons of meat that had gone bad, so I tried very hard to curb my behavior. On my own I did ok, but was still over spending, so I went to a therapist. Talking to her helped me release that fear that I had bottled away right after the storm. I went into survival mode and hadn't come out until I saw the therapist.
She suggested I started writing a list as I did before the storm and sticking to what I had on it. The list and learning to "let go and let God" worked miracles! Why did I tell you this? Because yesterday armed with my list I came out of Wal-Mart prouder than I had felt in a long time. I went in with $300 and came out with $71 remaining!! I hunted down sale items and got only what was on the list. This month makes a solid 1 1/2 years that I have shopped without fear of Katrina. I no longer fear losing things. I trust in The Father and He has healed me in more ways than I can explain.
The Day I Chose Bliss God Started My Healing & I'm Forever Grateful
Namaste
I choose bliss too and I'm very pleased to meet you.
ReplyDeleteWow I guess I didn't realize how profoundly Hurricane Katrina effected so many people in so many ways. I'm sorry you had to go through that, but proud of you for seeking help.
ReplyDeletefirst...i just have to praise god. second, baby girls and mommas...well, that will bring out the fangs in us momma's and i'm so glad that she is fine. and pts, wow...and i am totally in awe and amazement of how god works...and how you continually see it and give him glory. you totally bless me! i love you girl.
ReplyDeleteDon't you just love the way God takes care of every little issue we have? I love that he is a God who is not only concerned about my spiritual health, but my mental, physical, and emotional health. He takes care of us completely. Thanks for sharing this. Have a beautiful day.
ReplyDeleteAwesome Tabitha! Thank you for sharing!
ReplyDeleteI am so proud of you and what you have accomplished with your groceries. We all suffer from things we have to overcome and sounds like you are doing just that. It is so hard to watch our children be hurt, too. I certainly know that feeling you had about your daughter. You are such a wonderful, loving Mom and I am sure she knows you only want the best for her.
ReplyDeleteTabitha...I feel your pain with PC...I just went through the same with my daughter -- although there was no misunderstanding, just heartache. A momma bear needs to protect her cubs...it's as natural as the sun rising in the morning. I am actually trying to learn from my daughter, who has the ability to feel hurt without feeling angry at the person who hurt her. She is like no one I know -- unbelievably special in her kindness.
ReplyDeleteI've also lived through PTSD...and I TRULY celebrate your Wal-mart success story. It takes a lot of hard work to get over such a stress ...my hats off to you.
have a great day my friend.
Beautiful discovery and "butterfly" growth, Tabitha. I am so glad your therapist helped you identify the issue and that you rose to the challenge. Proud of you! Doesn't growth feel wonderful!!?? I love it when I have a breakthrough. I feel like a kite on a string that could soar forever. :-) Hugs!
ReplyDeleteI'll add my voice to the chorus of friends who are celebrating your growth and progress, Tabitha.
ReplyDeleteI think a key component to your continued growth as a mother, and to your continuing to be free of PTSD is that you are being open and honest about your feelings. Stuff isn't getting bottled up inside and then exploding. I'm so glad for you, Tabitha.
And the fact that you are sharing your struggles and triumphs is a blessing to many others, like me.
It is wonderful that the Lord cares for each of us...
ReplyDeleteyoung and old...and those in between!
Happy that His blessings fell upon you and your lovely one :)
Yay to you for overcoming. So sorry you were caught in Katrina's wrath. I watched the whole thing happen that weekend from my hospital bed with my second baby. Then 4 weeks later with a c-section, nursing a newborn, a 2 year old and an SUV cram packed we made a run from Rita. Fortunately we were able to come home to everything just the way we left it. I'm glad everything is good with you now. :)
ReplyDeleteWow! Thanks for visiting my site, and I'm sooooo thankful to have visited yours! God will be faithful to you! I'm touched by your honesty and excited for you for your freedom from anxiety and fear!!!
ReplyDeleteProud of you, Tabby! I still overbuy a few items due to that "MUST PREPARE FOR MORE TROUBLE" instinct. My main thing is buying dozens upon dozens of cans of Vienna sausages so that in a pinch, the dogs, cats, fish and us could eat them!!! And boxes and boxes of powdered milk. It's hard to stop.
ReplyDeleteYou did good with PC and all I can say is, it's very hard to push back that mother's instinct to step in and protect your baby (they are babies forever!) from danger.
Wow, that had to have been so traumatic to have gone through. Praise God that you were able to let go and live free again. – I tend to over buy, but I don’t have an excuse…
ReplyDeleteHi dear,
ReplyDeleteEven yesterday I was reminding myself to "let go and let God". If we say we trust Him then we CAN NOT worry because He's got our backs. Me too, I choose bliss. This is gonna be my mantra now- I choose bliss. When the going gets tough, I choose bliss. When the storms hit, I choose bliss. When I get weary and heavy laden and try to faint not, I choose bliss. Thank you for this quickening of my spirit. I'm sure glad that I logged on to you this afternoon- smile!
As for the dating scene and mama's girl, our Lord will see you all through because you chose bliss. Have an awesome weekend!
LJ
PS. Please pray for someone very close to me who needs to see a therapist but won't go... may God divinely convince him to make that step even as I praise Him in faith believing that it is already done. Thank you!
ReplyDeleteLJ