How do you love someone who's wronged you?


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Let Love be your only debt! If you love others, you have done all that the Law demands.
Romans 13:8 CEV

So, how do you love someone who's wronged you? This was my dilemma for many years and I truly didn't see a way around it until now. I am learning that anger and content will hold you down like an anchor. Where love will send you soaring like a bird. I'd rather fly than sink any day, so I decided to love my foes regardless. I could give you a sheet of paper filled with names of those who have hurt my heart, but I can just as easily give you a novel of names of those I love and truly know that I am loved in return.

My Grandmother use to say "give them to God" and I'd do that, but not truly. I still allowed their action to create great anger and hurt within me. I'd lose sleep, would eat less and at one point in my life had a heart attack. That was my breaking point. That was the moment I thought to myself "are you crazy girl?" "Are you willing to die behind someone's bull crap?" The answer was a resounding Hell No! I was no longer willing to allow anger and hurt to rule my way of living. I decided to kill them with kindness and I have to tell you it has worked like a charm!

My only sin (if love was a sin) would indeed be Love. I love all of God's children. Even those who don't always do right by me. I love them the most, because they are the ones who are damaged. I love them as Jesus loves me - Unconditionally. So, how do you in fact love someone who's wronged you? You give them to God and love them the best you can. In loving them you will feel freedom. Freedom from pain and anger. You will notice as you go through your days that you are no longer sinking, but you are indeed soaring. :)

Be Blessed♥

26 comments:

  1. yes, i do......
    its part of my journey i guess

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  2. This is something I struggle with. Immensely. I was sexually abused by my older brother growing up and I just can't forgive him. That meant pretty much estranging myself from a lot of my family who didn't want to believe me. It's hard. I want my family in my life, but not at the price I would have to pay of denying the truth and my emotions. Time will tell.

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  3. acceptance ~ that's how. acceptance of the fact they hurt your heart. and understanding why. and ... moving on. lest we be turned into that pillar of salt, like Lot's wife. great post.

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  4. Ahhh....beautiful post and one that many of us probably need to read. When I've been wronged it just eats me up inside for so long until I do finally hand it over to Him. Thank you for a great reminder.

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  5. Hello Tabitha,

    My first thought is for your reader Yaya above: "Time will heal" by God's grace alone.

    It is hard, and your words have convicted me because I know it, and I try it, but I have not quite gotten it right. I will make more effort from henceforth and believe God shall give me the victory in this area of my life ... to embrace every hurt and every pain and every threat of anger with love. As Jesus holds not my bad or foolish behaviour against me, so shall I remember not to hold the bad behaviours of others against them.

    Be blessed today.

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  6. i agree tab...and you know what else? praying for them in sincere prayer has been a great way for me to begin to feel their feelings and understand them more too. thanks.

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  7. Lisa: Thank you for commenting!

    Yaya: I can NOT say I know what you've been through, but I will say this with love. Even if you never go around him again forgive him for Yourself (even if you never say it out loud to anyone). I guarantee you that in some way or another he WILL have to answer for his wrong doings.

    Tinkerbell: So True!!

    Elizabeth: Welcome! I'm glad that you give it to the Father!

    Lilly: I truly do know how hard it can be. I has taken me YEARS to get where I am today, so I Fully understand. Have A Blessed Day!

    D: You are absolutely right! Praying for them sincerely is indeed a great way to heal yourself. Love You Girl!

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  8. Tabitha,

    I found your site via Caroline (The Zen in You) and I'm so pleased I did. I loved what you said about giving the person who's wronged you to God.

    A long time ago, I had so much anger towards a friend who had hurt me.

    Another friend suggested that I write a forgiveness letter to this person. It was hard to do, but when I finished, I felt so free.

    I took a step further and burned the letter, saying my own prayer of forgiveness as the ashes blew away. It felt wonderful:~)

    Thanks for this post and reminding me of the importance of letting go of anger/hurt.

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  9. Sara, I'm so honored to have you visiting my little blog and I hope you'll return! Writing and then burning the letter had to have been a freeing moment for you! I have done this recently and I would recommend it to anyone who needs to let go.

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  10. Darn it, i'm sending you something i wrote this morning...just on this ... amazing.

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  11. Oh hon - wonderful post!! I think sometimes we forget to offer ourselves grace!! To forgive isn't just offering up grace to someone else - it's offering up grace to ourselves. Right on target hon!! Don't we all struggle with this one!! I know I do - better at it than I used to be - but it still trips me up on occasion!! Hug hugs and Namaste you beautiful girl, Sarah

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  12. Your grandmother is a wise woman, Tabitha! The greatest gift we give ourselves is forgiveness.

    I, too, would rather soar with the eagles. I thought I recognized you the last time I took to the wing! ;-)

    Love and Peace, L

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  13. Braja: Great minds think alike!

    Sarah: It wasn't until this past year where I can honestly say I have this under control. you always make me smile dear friend. :)

    Linda: My mom's name is Linda so I truly love that name! Next time you take flight look to your left and I'll be with you. :) *hugs*

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  14. Beautiful Post! You are so right about a lot of things. Anger will drag you down. Very inspirational!

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  15. another beautiful post, your writing has a way of making me do a self-check just to make sure I'm staying in line with God's will for my life. Have a great day!

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  16. Matthew 5-48 teaches us to love our enemy. And the end is my favorite....be perfect as our Father in Heaven is Perfect.....

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  17. Beautiful Tabitha you always have messages of love :-)

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  18. Wonderful thoughts! I have missed you Tabitha...I feel like we haven't "visited" forever!

    I hope you are well.

    This is some great insight. It makes so much sense, but also can be difficult to implement. Thanks for your encouragement!

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  19. Dreamwriter: Thank you so very much for reading! I so appreciate you!

    Mommy of Many: That is indeed a blessed compliment you've given! I thank you wholeheartedly. :)

    HiHoOhio: Amen! Thanks for visiting today!!

    Darsden: I'm blushing Dar :) Your words always make me smile. I'm so grateful for your compliment. *hugs*

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  20. Ugh, unconditional love along with a terrible betrayal still haven't released my heart from it's bondage. I want so desperately to forgive & be free, but I just can't seem to get there. I'll just keep praying!

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  21. I try not to dwell on the hurts of the past, but they do pop up, even though I think I'm finished with them, finished with the anger and the trauma and the sadness. I do feel very sorry for those who meanly hurt me. I think you are farther along on your journey of forgiveness than I am, although you are very much younger!!!

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  22. I invite you to the 100 Lifestyle Change challenge. Check out my list and join the fun..Take the challenge!

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  23. What a lovely and wise grandmother you were blessed with.

    I believe any problem we have we can give to God. One way I do that is everytime I think of my problem I think of God instead.

    I love your honesty!

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  24. It's not always easy to forgive a wrong especially when it has caused a lot of pain, physical or emotional. However, forgiveness can be a very freeing experience whether it's done face to face or symbolically. This is a valuable message, Tabitha...thank you ~ :)

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You bless me with your presence! Tabitha♥

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