Convictions

*The first two lovelies who'll receive a gift from me are Genie Sea and Old Dame Penniwig!"

For a few years now I've heard Joyce Meyer say, "if you feel convicted." I never truly knew what it meant, because I hadn't experienced it yet. Remember I said yet, but I absolutely know what it means to feel convicted now. What I mean is although I've always been a compassionate person there was a time I was lost. I didn't understand that I was not in control and because of this I said some hurtful things to those in my past. People who I knew were just passing through, so I honestly thought it didn't matter. I said "I Love You" when I knew I truly did not feel this way, but they did. This is how they became hurt by me. Another thing is I had a very very bad potty mouth. I grew up in a family of cussers and so I learned that behavior. It's been a struggle, but there has been great changes. Everyday is a struggle and a clean canvas to do the right thing for me.

My weight issue is another thing I've felt convicted about, because NOW I know that this is something I must do. Not only for my health, but because this body is a gift and He lives within me. Because I believe He lives within me so strongly every part of me wants and needs to Clean House. I'm more aware of what He wants from me and for me, so it has been very easy to get up and exercise. I'm very proud of this! The gym was not designed for the disabled, so I have to be very creative. No Problemo! I've been exercising for 15 minutes daily and watching my portions. I am NOT forbidding myself the things I love, but I am removing somethings that I just know will never help me reach my goal (like sodas). Moderation is key!

I've also realized that for a time I was lying to myself. I would say "I am beautiful" or "I love me," but I wasn't truly feeling this. Realization #1: I must love me as God loves me, because He does not make mistakes. Realization #2: I was created by Him, therefore I am His masterpiece. I am just as He intended me to be. But, in saying this we must not use this as an excuse to abuse our bodies by neglecting it (gaining or losing too much weight). Everyday there's a new lesson. Everyday there's a chance to get it right. Everyday there's an opportunity to see our mistakes and change them. Everyday there's forgiveness from the things that may make us feel convicted.

Namaste,