Saying Goodbye :(



Yesterday my family and I found out that my cousin passed away. She was in a very crazy marriage, so we had been looking for her. My uncle found her yesterday morning in the newspaper. She passed away on the 9th and is being buried today in New Orleans. If my uncle had not read her obituary she would be buried and none of us would have known. It's very hurtful for us, because we tried so hard to reach her. He kept her away! He allowed her to die with no family around!!

Today my cousin whom I love with all I have will be buried and I can not attend her burial. He gave us no warning, no opportunity to say goodbye. He denied her the right to hear that she was loved deeply.

In 9 months we have lost our grandmother, an uncle and now a cousin. I'm wiped out. I'm tired and sad and numb. I can not believe this has happened in this fashion. She's an Angel now and I know our grandparents, her dad and our uncle greeted her with open arms. That is what I hold on to. But for now I am extremely tired. Tired of death. Tired of Evil people. Tired of crying. Tired of hurting. Within 9 months my heart has been crushed three times never truly healing before another death arrives. And yet, I'm still grateful. For many things and for many reasons.

Life is fragile. Please do NOT take it for granted.

I Love You Michelle, Uncle Russell and Grams!! Please help us get through this. It's just a bit too much for my soul to take on.

Namaste
Tabitha

16 comments:

  1. Oh Tabitha I'm so sorry for your losses. And this most recent one sounds so tragic, making it even harder to process.
    Wishing you peace.
    Yaya

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  2. Sending you sympathy, hope, hugz, and luv. And a reminder that you can pluck the blossoming dawn from the deepest stalk of darkness. Celebrate the joy that were their individual lives. The heaviest thing to carry is the material absence of their passing.

    Praying for you and your family.

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  3. My deepest condolences dear one. Hugs! I send you healing love.

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  4. Tabitha, My prayers go out for your healing. I am so sorry for your lose and for it to be this way, makes it even worse. He sounds like a sad insecure little man, he felt like the only way to keep her was to not let anyone else love her. He didn't love her ..he posessed her.
    Believe me when I say, it never gets easier, to lose a loved one, but the pain does fade with time. Let the good memories take over and let the sorrow go. They are in a better place and are waiting for you to join them someday.
    Hugs and prayers
    Molly

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  5. sending you love and support. I would be devastated. I am so sorry you and your family are going through this. Please know that your strength (even when the last thing you probably feel sometimes is strong) shines as a beakon to us all.

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  6. Tabitha honey I am so sorry to hear. Horrible people will be dealt with on a higher level. Rest assure your cousin is now in a better place with ones that do love her. Hard year for sure for you and your family. The messages on your blog speak volumns of the faith you have! "Let Jesus lift you up at this time and find comfort in his love" surround yourself with your immediate family find comfort with them. I am so sorry for all, xoxodar

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  7. Tabitha, I'm sorry for your lost! You and your family are in my prayers, but know this; we don't come in to this life alone and surely we don't depart alone! She was surrounded by family and angels, just not your typical crowd;) Plus...She already knows that you and your family loves her.

    Sharing the love,
    Julia

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  8. Oh, Sweetness, I'm so sorry. All the hearts in Blogland go out to you and your family. Know that she knows now, even if you didn't get to say it... xoxo

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  9. ((((Tabitha)))) I am so sorry for your loss.

    I understand where you are coming from as my own sister ostracised herself from all her family many years ago and her husband was behind it. I pray that, one day, she sees through him as he was also an instrument in separating her from her two daughters to a previous marriage. We are helpless to do anything but pray that, one day, she will see the light.

    Sending you prayers and healing vibes ~

    love, light and peace,
    serena

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  10. My prayers are with you and your family during this difficult time. I, too, have had difficult family situations. My brother, Dad and Mom all died within the last two years. Due to very serious family stuff, I wasn't able to attend my mother's wake. She did not have a funeral because family members decided not to give her one. I am planning a memorial service for all those who feel the desire to honor her in this special, spiritual way.

    Know that God is with you. Feel the angels supporting you through this time.

    Love and sympathy, Linda

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  11. So sorry to hear about this. That is very selfish of him to not tell your family...crazy! You are a wonderful soul...I assure you that she will hear your loving prayers.

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  12. Honey, I wish I could give you a big hug. Its hard to handle all this and understand why. But I want you to cling onto the fact that you have a strong spirit and that is what is the important thing. Our spirits. Your cousin is at peace and happy now and away from that evil man. She is surrounded by love and free. She knows you love her. She really knows. Hug your family tight around you. Much love to you.

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  13. Hey Hun,

    My deepest sympathy.

    In your own words :

    "I Humbly accept my Fate with all of the Rain and Sunshine in which it holds."

    Beautiful words. There is no point in not accepting what is.

    I wish u strenght and acceptance and love and peace.

    Namaste.
    2Da1

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  14. Hugs and prayers to you and your family!

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  15. Tabitha, please accept my hugs, too. And please lean on your wonderful husband in this time, letting his strength lift you enough so that you feel your wounds begin to heal. Let love live in your heart, and it will then spill out into the world. Forgiveness will follow. "Peace be unto you...", as the man said.
    ~ Julie

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  16. Holding your heart in my spirit, dear Tabby!

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You bless me with your presence! Tabitha♥

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